[๐๐๐ฒ ๐] ๐๐๐ฏ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐๐ญโฃ
๐๐ ๐๐๐ฒ๐ฌ ๐จ๐ ๐๐ข๐ฆ๐, ๐๐ซ๐๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ ๐๐ง๐ ๐๐ข๐๐๐ซ๐ข๐จ๐ฎ๐ฌ ๐๐๐ฌ๐ข๐ฅ๐ข๐๐ง๐๐ ๐ข๐ง ๐๐ข๐๐ฐ๐ข๐๐๐ซ๐ฒ
[๐๐๐ฒ ๐] ๐๐๐ฏ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐๐ญโฃ
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Back to the Odyssey again. I love the bit at the end when Odysseus comes home. He kills all the suitors who are wanting to marry his wife (he had been gone for 20 years so was presumed dead). He then climbs into bed with Penelope, his wife.โฃ
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Thereโs a build-up to this scene. Weโve been waiting for it for the whole fairytale splurge of the Odyssey, so when it happens, it has to be introduced slowly - first, Odysseusโ son turns up, and Penelope weeps for joy. Then Odysseus comes in disguised as a beggar, and the suitors are awful to him. Then thereโs a contest to see if someone can shoot an arrow straight through 12 axes, something which marks Odysseus out as the returning King. And then Odysseus and Telemachus do one of those round up action scenes where they kill everyone in sight.โฃ
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The bit where you think itโs all over and the nice period where everythingโs back to normal are actually a pretty long way apart in the text.โฃ
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Thereโs a lot of wisdom in this bit of the story. When weโre working towards something, it feels like everything will be okay when we get there finally; itโll all be gravy after that. But of course, it feels different in reality. Sometimes weโre too tired to enjoy the moment. Sometimes it doesnโt feel real. โฃ
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When I got signed off as a midwife, it was a good moment, but it was also less impactful than Iโd hoped for. I still had some shifts to go and a few things to hand in. This is the horrible thing about a big effort; by the time you get to the end, it sometimes doesnโt feel worth it.โฃ
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The real โfinal momentโ of my degree was 6 months later, with money in the bank, and me conducting a waterbirth. For that particular client, I was able to be the midwife Iโd be aiming to become.โฃ
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As you get better at midwifery, you will have insanely good moments. But donโt expect your progress to be linear. Feel it out, and when the moment when youโre home and dry arrives, notice it and savour it.โฃ
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All my best,โฃ
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Ellie.โฃ
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